Next time you and your little niece or nephew are faced with a problem, try this out!

Take out a large piece of paper and a marker and tell him or her you are going to do some important work. Children love to be involved with making lists and writing words. It makes them feel very grown-up.

Write down your niece’s or nephew’s thoughts, feelings, and concerns about the issue, and then write down your own.

Ask your niece or nephew, “What can help you?” Or “What can we do?” Depending upon his or her age, say that you need 3-5 ideas. You can offer some ideas as well, particularly if he or she is having a hard time getting started.

Next, read back the ideas and ask your niece or nephew if he or she thinks the idea will work. Cross out any ideas that you aren’t comfortable with, explaining why you want to “take that one out.” Cross out any that your niece or nephew thinks may not be helpful.

Together, choose the best solution and put it to work! This is a great activity for helping children remember to brush their teeth in the morning or put their toys away. It can also be used for many issues that come up between siblings and peers. In that case, each child would have the opportunity to come up with a few solutions.

Just like when eating vegetables, children are more apt to try something if they’ve been involved in preparing it!

Dana Rosenbloom, M.S. Ed, is owner and therapist at Dana's Kids, a business dedicated to providing support and education for families with both typically-developing children, as well as those with special needs, who are struggling with developmental challenges.

Photo: marin
Published: October 1, 2013